Oh dear, oh my .... my give a damn meter has been turned OFF!

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There are a few things that are really annoying me, but I am really trying to focus on trying to withdraw something positive from this whole experience.  One of the gifts wisdom has so wonderfully bestowed upon me is to try to turn EVERYTHING from wine (or whine) to vinegar (rinse out the anguish) to champagne!  (Pop, let it out.  Let er RIP!)  

Well, giggle, snort ... very few people even read my blogs.  Like today, for instance!!  Geez, what a day of a hell on a week bouncing around WIRED.  This really young chap where I work came sauntering in today (yes, that is a great word even for someone not writing a novel or a script ... to be made into a play or a movie ... where she stars opposite that guy who plays the latest Superman and Man from U.N.C.L.E. dreamboat of "if I were 10 or 20 younger....).  I complimented him on his advancement which his chest puffed right out of when he then introduced his brother, whom he was escorting and showing around his new workplace.  Timing is everything ... timing things right is a gift isn't it?  

He said:  "Ah, yes, and Jeannette is a writer of a blog and has many many followers on social media."  WOW, I got a zinger:  "I said, aw, thanks, so you've read it then?"  This young whipper-snapper politely referred to as a chap.  (NOW, you GET IT).   He was too young, and still blinded by the glory of the compliment, through the glow came the honest answer:  "Uh, no".

Someone older and wiser would giggle, snort or gleefully snicker at the big trap the chap had just handed to them.  Like forcing a speeder with a strong tendency to get off on police car chases, disciples of Fast and Furious fame to go lay a tire popper track thinga majiggy then back his car up a few blocks away, start a cop car chase, being hunted and pursued.  Then go exactly the familiar way, and driving over that popper track thinga majiggy that blows up tires contraption.  

I was forced to exude my frustration and humility in writing here.  Unencumbered.  Fairly alone with my harmonious strokes of my thoughts, my fingers, to the keys.  Hardly read.  Maybe there is freedom in that.  I admit, I've been peeking around writing about nothing more than experimenting with styles and topics that appeal to me.  Even for me, it is getting a little confusing.  

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I trust a champion will emerge or a gust of more than a few readers, or maybe five on a good day.  I know it can happen.  It has happened to me a couple of times on my optioneerjm.blogspot.ca blog where a particular post would bounce around a lot and jiggle with some spikes in readership.  It was a glorious two times that resonate.  The elusive reward of actually resonating with a certain group of people, under any number of topics, or a singular interest or passion shared.  A nice feeling when you're more used to a horseshoe curve, more like a wish or a hope to be blessed with a little traction.  It is really great.

I couldn't imagine being one of those bloggers who just blogs, turning a passion into writing or writing into a passion with uninhibited ability to express oneself in whatever fashion they want.  I got a hint last weekend, a great weekend.  In fact, one of my greatest or most favorite weekends I can remember from a very long time.  Maybe it WAS 10 years ago when I got married to the love of my life, Rob.  My affectionate version being "the Hunkster Hubster" mostly in my tweets as @optioneerJM .  My whole family was together.  It has been only since August when we were all together, but for a wedding, it was clouded with intricacies of varying family dynamics is not any definition of quality family time!

I had the nerve to send this email to an organization, whom I edited out for obvious and legal reasons:

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Why do your communications not include a website link what-so-EVER?  Not even a paragraph as to who represents "communications@------------,ca" ? along with an alternative contact internal IMMEDIATE contact encrypted to hide for privacy but also someone where it can get IMMEDIATE attention.  Also include the time frame in which a person can anticipate a reply .. be realistic, but be sure you are really really close to following that rule or you will sink your trust in your attentiveness (or lack thereof), lose loyalty faster than the price of oil, to any messages you send out.  

 ~ Jeannette 

    @optioneerJM

"you need my help" . calm